I've had some time to think and rethink about my son's most recent ETR meeting. How one of the big dogs was there sitting in for the district ( I had met her before and she watched the first time around as her employee tried to work me over, this was pre-child advocate) and how everything played out.
I humbly admit that I'm not someone who "gets it" all that well in the moment. This trait could possibly be a coping technique from my past but I can say that it has protected me on occasion. I do much better thinking about things later. Later, I am astonished, later, I have a snappy retort to a rude phrase directed my way. Sigh. Still, I manage to muddle along.
A lobbyist I know told me not too long ago, "It's not a mediation unless everyone leaves the table unhappy." Ha, a cynical view I know but there is some truth to it.
So with that comment ringing in my ears I told our Child Advocate that I would let the speech subject be the place where I was most vocally unhappy (but in the end I wouldn't argue too much). It was perhaps manipulative of me but I think there needed to be a place where the pack of school personnel got to enjoy that I wouldn't get everything I wanted. I gave them that with the speech subject.
The bar is set so low on these speech tests that really, I've said it before, I would hate to hear what a kid who actually qualifies for speech services by their standards sounds like. That child wouldn't be able to speak. So they get to say they've done their job by testing while actually they are just continuing to be stingy with their services. I had documented by 2 outside organizations that speech therapy was needed. They had their ridiculous test.
Remember that these school personnel (in my experience) think their job is to protect district money and be as stingy as possible.
In an earlier conversation the School Psychologist suggested that many parents who seek out IEP's are simply trying to "use the system". (Her comment reminded me of how people sometimes argue about how people on food stamps are abusing that service by not really being responsible with the food they buy.) While something like that may rarely happen generally speaking that is utter nonsense (in both cases).
Still, this is the sort of ridiculous mentality many parents face regularly when trying to get an IEP written for their child. That must be the sort of ignorant rationalization that lets these sort of people still get some sleep at night.
In my case I (thankfully) have an expert beside me, guiding me and making sure that the district is actually doing the job that federal law requires. For the majority of parents though, they are on their own facing people who barely seem to know what they are doing. Or are so devious that they don't care what they are doing (as in the case of the big dog that came to my meetings). Sad, very sad for the state of the nation and children everywhere.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Another man's path
The problem with blogs is that they read as a story told backward. I am better at telling a story from the beginning. At this point though my writing are fairly random so I suppose it ceases to matter.
Not very long ago I took my children to our local schoolyard to play after supper. There was a man there with his 2 children and a metal detector. His children were friendly and we ended up talking. He had an interesting story.
I talked about dyslexia, what it was (since he didn't seem to know), what it meant to our family and how my older child is now getting along fine thanks to the school where my brother once went and the Orton Gillingham system.
He told me he worked for a company that moves offices but the work was sporadic. He said based on his work he felt the economy still wasn't doing very well.
His wife worked at Target where although she had been a valuable employee for many years there was never going to be any promotion for her (they had finally figured this out he said).
He had been moved from a very rural area into the big city at a young age when his mother found a man to run off with. Previously he had lived with her and his grandparents deep in the country. He never moved back to the country and ended up dropping out of one of my city's least respected high schools.
Although he didn't say he thought he had dyslexia he was so interested in my story I sensed that something was familiar to him. Later he told me that he couldn't read, that he never could and that he was pleased that both his children were able to read. He said his oldest especially was doing well in school and that he couldn't have been more proud. I was glad for him.
As I said before, he reminded me of my brother, he looked like him and they were roughly the same age. My brother's children do not have dyslexia either.
I went home and called my brother with dyslexia, and we talked about the huge financial sacrifice that my parents made so many years ago so that he might go to the school where my daughter goes now. That school at the time was the same price as going to college and my parents went to the bank and took out a loan for it that took them many years to pay off. He stayed there for 3 years and after that time (5th-7th grade) he could read and had some semblance of a self esteem again.
This man made me realize again how important of a decision my parents made.
Not very long ago I took my children to our local schoolyard to play after supper. There was a man there with his 2 children and a metal detector. His children were friendly and we ended up talking. He had an interesting story.
I talked about dyslexia, what it was (since he didn't seem to know), what it meant to our family and how my older child is now getting along fine thanks to the school where my brother once went and the Orton Gillingham system.
He told me he worked for a company that moves offices but the work was sporadic. He said based on his work he felt the economy still wasn't doing very well.
His wife worked at Target where although she had been a valuable employee for many years there was never going to be any promotion for her (they had finally figured this out he said).
He had been moved from a very rural area into the big city at a young age when his mother found a man to run off with. Previously he had lived with her and his grandparents deep in the country. He never moved back to the country and ended up dropping out of one of my city's least respected high schools.
Although he didn't say he thought he had dyslexia he was so interested in my story I sensed that something was familiar to him. Later he told me that he couldn't read, that he never could and that he was pleased that both his children were able to read. He said his oldest especially was doing well in school and that he couldn't have been more proud. I was glad for him.
As I said before, he reminded me of my brother, he looked like him and they were roughly the same age. My brother's children do not have dyslexia either.
I went home and called my brother with dyslexia, and we talked about the huge financial sacrifice that my parents made so many years ago so that he might go to the school where my daughter goes now. That school at the time was the same price as going to college and my parents went to the bank and took out a loan for it that took them many years to pay off. He stayed there for 3 years and after that time (5th-7th grade) he could read and had some semblance of a self esteem again.
This man made me realize again how important of a decision my parents made.
Thursday, July 4, 2013
An interesting question and my answer
I just had a really interesting question presented to me by a truly brilliant man who has struggled and succeeded in having a great life despite having had a hard time in school due to his dyslexia.
He asked me why I was working so hard to get my kids what they need to learn to read, spell and write when there are so many new technologies out there that help with these things? He has utilized things like audio books and computer programs and now has a PhD himself.
While I believe that his question is truly valid and I took no offense my answer goes something like this:
School in it's standard form (and believe me that is what it is in Catholic school) is a game with rules and expectations. Without the special instruction (and personalized pace) that my child is currently receiving dyslexic children are perceived by many as not being as intelligent as those children for whom sitting still in class, turning in the required worksheets in the required amount of time and so forth are not so difficult.
Nothing could be further from the truth of course, their brains simply operate differently and require different and sometimes more stimulus to learn what comes easily to some.
I explained that had my child stayed in the school she was originally in she would have come through illiterate (or barely literate). She and her parents would have been accused of any number of things such as not working hard enough on homework. I know this from 2 examples of children of this happened to.
I personally read with my child each and every night before bed while she was in kindergarten and first grade. I knew instantly when she began to get Orton Gillingham because I saw it working in her nightly reading.
Without being at the school she is in now, with total immersion in a method that works with teachers that understand her brain, I believe she would have suffered and blamed herself throughout childhood no matter what I said to her.
So these days we do still work hard here at our house. Homework and tutoring throughout the summer months. I wont say it's nose to the grindstone but really there is a lot more expectation than what I personally grew up with.
In a dyslexic person like my child I think of the brain paths which work with language as bumpy roads with potholes.
While I hope that by concentrating on rebuilding those roads with a method that works doesn't compromise her brain strengths in other areas I still believe that it is essential for people to be literate even with new technologies to help them.
He asked me why I was working so hard to get my kids what they need to learn to read, spell and write when there are so many new technologies out there that help with these things? He has utilized things like audio books and computer programs and now has a PhD himself.
While I believe that his question is truly valid and I took no offense my answer goes something like this:
School in it's standard form (and believe me that is what it is in Catholic school) is a game with rules and expectations. Without the special instruction (and personalized pace) that my child is currently receiving dyslexic children are perceived by many as not being as intelligent as those children for whom sitting still in class, turning in the required worksheets in the required amount of time and so forth are not so difficult.
Nothing could be further from the truth of course, their brains simply operate differently and require different and sometimes more stimulus to learn what comes easily to some.
I explained that had my child stayed in the school she was originally in she would have come through illiterate (or barely literate). She and her parents would have been accused of any number of things such as not working hard enough on homework. I know this from 2 examples of children of this happened to.
I personally read with my child each and every night before bed while she was in kindergarten and first grade. I knew instantly when she began to get Orton Gillingham because I saw it working in her nightly reading.
Without being at the school she is in now, with total immersion in a method that works with teachers that understand her brain, I believe she would have suffered and blamed herself throughout childhood no matter what I said to her.
So these days we do still work hard here at our house. Homework and tutoring throughout the summer months. I wont say it's nose to the grindstone but really there is a lot more expectation than what I personally grew up with.
In a dyslexic person like my child I think of the brain paths which work with language as bumpy roads with potholes.
While I hope that by concentrating on rebuilding those roads with a method that works doesn't compromise her brain strengths in other areas I still believe that it is essential for people to be literate even with new technologies to help them.
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
I digress (in a sense) to talk about breakdowns of systems
When I drive through Cleveland I am always still shocked by the legions of empty factories that line the city. They are not being converted to housing. They are not being bulldozed to make way for malls. They are simply empty buildings and there are many of them. They have been empty for years now. Even some of the for sale signs are weathered on the red brick blocks of buildings that once contained hundreds of workers.
On the good side, they aren't spewing their grime into the air or Lake Erie or packing the landfills with their waste. On the bad side, they are modern day ghost towns.
Many of those factories began to shut down in the 80's. Here in the U.S. the area, like many other formerly hardworking productive cities is part of what is jokingly referred to as the "Rust Belt" (once the "Steel Belt").
There is no real end to the ghostliness in sight. Politicians always go to the area and talk about bringing back jobs. It has yet to happen.
This lack will undoubtedly continue until perhaps people no longer remember that there were once jobs there.
Work, productivity, education, where else is there a breakdown in this country? Change is bound to happen but there should be some counter balance someplace, some healing aids being applied, some loud mouth politician making their platform about making changes that actually provide results. I don't see any of that right now.
Take education for example.
Occasionally I'll talk to someone who knows of a teacher who closed the door and taught the class differently. Perhaps they were an "old school" type teacher. Or they weren't trained here in Ohio. Or there is something else unique about them. Inevitably they have taught in a way that has something to do with phonics. The teacher was looking for results and once they found them, this is what they taught year after year. After all who goes into teaching wanting to do a bad job of it.
Phonics was the way I was once taught but a teacher that would have taught me would at the least most likely be in their 80's at this point. Back then even Sesame Street had tricks to sound out words and I remember those. Things have changed a lot since then.
The whole language methodology took the world by storm and Read Recovery became the preferred method of tutoring anyone with special needs (which doesn't work for dyslexic children I might remind everyone). Some states (like CA) have since dropped these methods (for the most part) but the damage has been done and it's been done nationally.
It's sort of like the Emperors New clothes story. Everyone has been playing along that this stuff works for a long time. This is why the School Psychologists have to be so defensive. This is why districts have to lie, distract parents with finger pointing, try to dismiss well trained doctors reports and pay extra money for insurance to cover the costs of their legal fees in case a parent gets mad enough to pursue their child's rights right on into the courtroom.
I don't have the answer to all of this yet but I'm working on it.
On the good side, they aren't spewing their grime into the air or Lake Erie or packing the landfills with their waste. On the bad side, they are modern day ghost towns.
Many of those factories began to shut down in the 80's. Here in the U.S. the area, like many other formerly hardworking productive cities is part of what is jokingly referred to as the "Rust Belt" (once the "Steel Belt").
There is no real end to the ghostliness in sight. Politicians always go to the area and talk about bringing back jobs. It has yet to happen.
This lack will undoubtedly continue until perhaps people no longer remember that there were once jobs there.
Work, productivity, education, where else is there a breakdown in this country? Change is bound to happen but there should be some counter balance someplace, some healing aids being applied, some loud mouth politician making their platform about making changes that actually provide results. I don't see any of that right now.
Take education for example.
Occasionally I'll talk to someone who knows of a teacher who closed the door and taught the class differently. Perhaps they were an "old school" type teacher. Or they weren't trained here in Ohio. Or there is something else unique about them. Inevitably they have taught in a way that has something to do with phonics. The teacher was looking for results and once they found them, this is what they taught year after year. After all who goes into teaching wanting to do a bad job of it.
Phonics was the way I was once taught but a teacher that would have taught me would at the least most likely be in their 80's at this point. Back then even Sesame Street had tricks to sound out words and I remember those. Things have changed a lot since then.
The whole language methodology took the world by storm and Read Recovery became the preferred method of tutoring anyone with special needs (which doesn't work for dyslexic children I might remind everyone). Some states (like CA) have since dropped these methods (for the most part) but the damage has been done and it's been done nationally.
It's sort of like the Emperors New clothes story. Everyone has been playing along that this stuff works for a long time. This is why the School Psychologists have to be so defensive. This is why districts have to lie, distract parents with finger pointing, try to dismiss well trained doctors reports and pay extra money for insurance to cover the costs of their legal fees in case a parent gets mad enough to pursue their child's rights right on into the courtroom.
I don't have the answer to all of this yet but I'm working on it.
Monday, July 1, 2013
Another ETR meeting and more of the same
So recently I had another ETR meeting as my son transitions out of Preschool and into School Aged Standards
(or in this case they were going to try to say he "didn't qualify for an IEP"- raise you hand if you've ever been told something similar. This is the name of this ridiculous game in a district that cares more about money than about taking care of the needs of children with learning differences).
Anyhow a warning flag as we walked into the room was the following:
6 people from the district showed up:
1. The person who recently tested him (again) for OT.
2. The person who recently tested him (again) for Speech.
3. The Special Needs Preschool Director (who is fairly clueless about how the district habit of disqualifying children is having a negative impact on society, why should she care as long as she looks good to her boss?)
4. The Itinerant Preschool coorindator if I didn't mention before they all wanted her to handle my son's OT only we insisted on an actual OT to do his remediation (since he is severe in this area and this is a decision I did not regret).
5. The School Psychologist (have yet to meet one I think is ethical, this may be the closest I've come to tolerating someone in this position but in her final words she attempted to discredit all our private testing etc. This job is so low it makes used car sales looks like an honorable profession in comparison).
6. The Special Needs Advisor who oversees all special needs in the entire district. I have a history with her. I knew her from before when she and the Jerk who tried to disqualify (read: step on all the legal rights of) my dyslexic daughter by guiding her Catholic school teacher to make sure her latest report card to suddenly read straight A's (a common trick according to my Advocate). Plus the other tactic was to pull a record of every book she had (attempted with my help) read by saying she had read all of these books and using that against her in order to disqualify her for the IEP that her diagnosis and needs so clearly deserve.
Part of this was the Catholic school we were in (horrible) and the other part was this guidance by the district (who knew these tricks now didn't they.)
At first, it was just me and (Thank God) the Child Advocate. I quickly went into the hall to call my husband to come from work to the meeting if he possibly could which he did. Remember from an earlier post I advised parents to NEVER go alone to any ETR or IEP meetings (I almost broke my own rule in a sense - how foolish). You need all the brain power, support etc for your child you can get in a room full of hostile people with an agenda. These people are truly not at all interested in what is best for your child (unless you are incredibly lucky and I highly doubt that happens often).
Once again I had gone in with a naive notion that things were somehow going to be smooth, on the up and up, honorable and easy. This seemed to me like a no brainer. We had a diagnosis from the top pediatric neuropsychologist saying clearly he has dyslexia. Easy right?
Ridiculous to have to say this but still a resounding NO.
In fact they even tried to use the fact that I said that my daughter is having success in school against me. Saying my child would "outgrow" his needs (because we have caught this exceptionally early (thanks to his sister and uncle I might remind everyone). My husband shot back that the only reason my daughter is having the success she is was because of $60K worth of the appropriate methodology (which they are utterly unable to provide). Thanks Honey - my husband can be very direct, I love that about him.
The OT was fine, there was no way to say he is anywhere near average on this part, he isn't. No way to scootch around this issue. Too cut and dried. Still, OT alone would not qualify him for an IEP at the school aged level.
Speech: he didn't qualify for any school district assistance. The bar here is set so low that I'd hate to see how bad off a child is that they would qualify would be. Speech issues are an early indicator of dyslexia but they love to use these tests that barely anyone could fail. Utter nonsense. So I guess we will have to continue to pay privately for speech therapy since one day he will have to sound out words. (And we already know this). (Parents be warned that it is common for a district to try to disqualify a child for anything based on speech, not okay but this has happened to us twice now).
Thank goodness our Child Advocate hammered on the details of the ETR, pointed out places I would have missed, insisted on percentages for part of the report which gave none (really now folks I was a grant writer back when I worked, not an educator, how would I know these sort of nuances, yet this is the sneaky tricky way this game is played all the time by all involved).
I don't think many normal people make it through this process successfully. It is almost essential that one have a Child Advocate.
I spent the rest of the day feeling I had been in the presence of creepiness that bordered on evil.
Until, that is I was talking to a teacher friend of mine. A teacher friend who really cares, who had helped many many children over the years. A person who speaks up, says when things aren't right and works on the side of some very needy children.
Bless her, she told me some stories that made me remember that I am so very lucky. We have caught my children's dyslexia early, we are able to get them what they need, we have resources and I don't have to be around school politics and district nonsense except on these IEP type occasions.
In her case, she has to deal with this stuff professionally every single day she is at work.
(or in this case they were going to try to say he "didn't qualify for an IEP"- raise you hand if you've ever been told something similar. This is the name of this ridiculous game in a district that cares more about money than about taking care of the needs of children with learning differences).
Anyhow a warning flag as we walked into the room was the following:
6 people from the district showed up:
1. The person who recently tested him (again) for OT.
2. The person who recently tested him (again) for Speech.
3. The Special Needs Preschool Director (who is fairly clueless about how the district habit of disqualifying children is having a negative impact on society, why should she care as long as she looks good to her boss?)
4. The Itinerant Preschool coorindator if I didn't mention before they all wanted her to handle my son's OT only we insisted on an actual OT to do his remediation (since he is severe in this area and this is a decision I did not regret).
5. The School Psychologist (have yet to meet one I think is ethical, this may be the closest I've come to tolerating someone in this position but in her final words she attempted to discredit all our private testing etc. This job is so low it makes used car sales looks like an honorable profession in comparison).
6. The Special Needs Advisor who oversees all special needs in the entire district. I have a history with her. I knew her from before when she and the Jerk who tried to disqualify (read: step on all the legal rights of) my dyslexic daughter by guiding her Catholic school teacher to make sure her latest report card to suddenly read straight A's (a common trick according to my Advocate). Plus the other tactic was to pull a record of every book she had (attempted with my help) read by saying she had read all of these books and using that against her in order to disqualify her for the IEP that her diagnosis and needs so clearly deserve.
Part of this was the Catholic school we were in (horrible) and the other part was this guidance by the district (who knew these tricks now didn't they.)
At first, it was just me and (Thank God) the Child Advocate. I quickly went into the hall to call my husband to come from work to the meeting if he possibly could which he did. Remember from an earlier post I advised parents to NEVER go alone to any ETR or IEP meetings (I almost broke my own rule in a sense - how foolish). You need all the brain power, support etc for your child you can get in a room full of hostile people with an agenda. These people are truly not at all interested in what is best for your child (unless you are incredibly lucky and I highly doubt that happens often).
Once again I had gone in with a naive notion that things were somehow going to be smooth, on the up and up, honorable and easy. This seemed to me like a no brainer. We had a diagnosis from the top pediatric neuropsychologist saying clearly he has dyslexia. Easy right?
Ridiculous to have to say this but still a resounding NO.
In fact they even tried to use the fact that I said that my daughter is having success in school against me. Saying my child would "outgrow" his needs (because we have caught this exceptionally early (thanks to his sister and uncle I might remind everyone). My husband shot back that the only reason my daughter is having the success she is was because of $60K worth of the appropriate methodology (which they are utterly unable to provide). Thanks Honey - my husband can be very direct, I love that about him.
The OT was fine, there was no way to say he is anywhere near average on this part, he isn't. No way to scootch around this issue. Too cut and dried. Still, OT alone would not qualify him for an IEP at the school aged level.
Speech: he didn't qualify for any school district assistance. The bar here is set so low that I'd hate to see how bad off a child is that they would qualify would be. Speech issues are an early indicator of dyslexia but they love to use these tests that barely anyone could fail. Utter nonsense. So I guess we will have to continue to pay privately for speech therapy since one day he will have to sound out words. (And we already know this). (Parents be warned that it is common for a district to try to disqualify a child for anything based on speech, not okay but this has happened to us twice now).
Thank goodness our Child Advocate hammered on the details of the ETR, pointed out places I would have missed, insisted on percentages for part of the report which gave none (really now folks I was a grant writer back when I worked, not an educator, how would I know these sort of nuances, yet this is the sneaky tricky way this game is played all the time by all involved).
I don't think many normal people make it through this process successfully. It is almost essential that one have a Child Advocate.
I spent the rest of the day feeling I had been in the presence of creepiness that bordered on evil.
Until, that is I was talking to a teacher friend of mine. A teacher friend who really cares, who had helped many many children over the years. A person who speaks up, says when things aren't right and works on the side of some very needy children.
Bless her, she told me some stories that made me remember that I am so very lucky. We have caught my children's dyslexia early, we are able to get them what they need, we have resources and I don't have to be around school politics and district nonsense except on these IEP type occasions.
In her case, she has to deal with this stuff professionally every single day she is at work.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
An update on where things are now for my daughter having received the correct form of instruction (Orton Gillingham) by well trained teachers in a well regarded school.
The other day I was clearing out some of the old school supplies we have around the house. Early on, when I had openly expressed to our family (while she was in the first part of first grade) that she was having trouble reading, one of my sister in laws gave me 200 flash cards of words that she was supposed to know (ha).
Of course she couldn't read them and I put them away high on a shelf, to be avoided. (No sense in trying to use a tool that was clearly not going to work).
Yesterday I found them again. She read them all at lighting speed with very few errors. I did see her "sound-out" a couple of them but really they presented barely any challenge to her.
What that let me know with no doubt was that she will not be illiterate. She has already had the following:
First grade: Half a year of Orton Gillingham immersion in school.
Summer Camp: a month long four hour a day intensive summer camp where her teacher basically finished off her dysgraphia issue single handedly. (around 600 minutes of 1 on 1 multi sensory approach).
Second Grade: Complete Orton Gillingham immersion in school.
This summer: Lexia homework (20 minutes every other day or so) and 2 hours a week of tutoring.
Which brings me to what comes next.
Her school is (on paper) $23K per year annually. Now this is not what we pay thanks to a scholarship etc but let me tell you what we pay is still far and beyond what Catholic school costs per year.
Still I believe she needs one more year at her current school and here is why:
While, at this point, she is not going to fall into the category of illiterate or barely literate (which is where sadly, so many dyslexic folks end up finding themselves) there are things I'm thinking she still needs:
1. Another year of practicing her skills in an environment that is helpful and supportive. Reminders of the methods that she has been so far. (Things like COPS, sounding out words etc).
2. Another year of smaller teacher/student ratio.
3. Another year to simply be a child in her current school that understands dyslexia and expects things in a far gentler way without the blame and finger pointing that can come with children who take extra time or are not perfectionists about their own work (as I've said before I find the children in Catholic School to be bored and miserable).
While the next Catholic school we plan on putting her into has at least an inkling about Orton Gillingham (the weekend class type of inkling) it's simply not enough to bring a child with dyslexia into the arena of thriving. We had to have the sort of school my daughter is in now for that to occur.
No possibly way would any of my children ever go back to the original Catholic school we were in.
Not with my memories of my daughter being papered with 8 worksheets a day (at least) by her first grade teacher (who never had any intention of teaching anyone what they really needed to know how to read).
Not with their changing her report card to reflect her to be a straight A student so that she would look like she didn't really have the dyslexia the doctor report found and therefore would not qualify for the scholarship she has now and additionally they wouldn't personally look like the crap school they really are (thank goodness for experienced Child Advocates who had seen that sort of nonsense before).
So while this is another year of financially paying way more then we had ever originally intended to pay I think, in the long run, it's money well spent.
The other day I was clearing out some of the old school supplies we have around the house. Early on, when I had openly expressed to our family (while she was in the first part of first grade) that she was having trouble reading, one of my sister in laws gave me 200 flash cards of words that she was supposed to know (ha).
Of course she couldn't read them and I put them away high on a shelf, to be avoided. (No sense in trying to use a tool that was clearly not going to work).
Yesterday I found them again. She read them all at lighting speed with very few errors. I did see her "sound-out" a couple of them but really they presented barely any challenge to her.
What that let me know with no doubt was that she will not be illiterate. She has already had the following:
First grade: Half a year of Orton Gillingham immersion in school.
Summer Camp: a month long four hour a day intensive summer camp where her teacher basically finished off her dysgraphia issue single handedly. (around 600 minutes of 1 on 1 multi sensory approach).
Second Grade: Complete Orton Gillingham immersion in school.
This summer: Lexia homework (20 minutes every other day or so) and 2 hours a week of tutoring.
Which brings me to what comes next.
Her school is (on paper) $23K per year annually. Now this is not what we pay thanks to a scholarship etc but let me tell you what we pay is still far and beyond what Catholic school costs per year.
Still I believe she needs one more year at her current school and here is why:
While, at this point, she is not going to fall into the category of illiterate or barely literate (which is where sadly, so many dyslexic folks end up finding themselves) there are things I'm thinking she still needs:
1. Another year of practicing her skills in an environment that is helpful and supportive. Reminders of the methods that she has been so far. (Things like COPS, sounding out words etc).
2. Another year of smaller teacher/student ratio.
3. Another year to simply be a child in her current school that understands dyslexia and expects things in a far gentler way without the blame and finger pointing that can come with children who take extra time or are not perfectionists about their own work (as I've said before I find the children in Catholic School to be bored and miserable).
While the next Catholic school we plan on putting her into has at least an inkling about Orton Gillingham (the weekend class type of inkling) it's simply not enough to bring a child with dyslexia into the arena of thriving. We had to have the sort of school my daughter is in now for that to occur.
No possibly way would any of my children ever go back to the original Catholic school we were in.
Not with my memories of my daughter being papered with 8 worksheets a day (at least) by her first grade teacher (who never had any intention of teaching anyone what they really needed to know how to read).
Not with their changing her report card to reflect her to be a straight A student so that she would look like she didn't really have the dyslexia the doctor report found and therefore would not qualify for the scholarship she has now and additionally they wouldn't personally look like the crap school they really are (thank goodness for experienced Child Advocates who had seen that sort of nonsense before).
So while this is another year of financially paying way more then we had ever originally intended to pay I think, in the long run, it's money well spent.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
I never expected.....
I always meant for this blog to be more helpful, to tell more detail about our stories and other stories I had heard. I don't think I'm quite achieving what I had originally set out to do but then things have not gone the way I expected them to go either.
I thought we would make personal breakthroughs (sort of like reinventing the wheel) rather than find that the tools we needed are already out there but expensive to afford.
I never expected that after getting a diagnosis the next hit would come when my daughter (and then later my son) totally had their rights trampled on by school professionals who had the agenda of protecting the school district's time energy and money by trying to deny my children the IEP's they are legally entitled to have based on their diagnosis.
On a positive day I see small changes in the world and think that maybe they are starting to add up. I think of all the celebrities who keep telling everyone that they have dyslexia and I think to myself every time the world heard the word dyslexia we get a tiny bit closer to taking care of the millions of children (and adults) who suffer because the wrong teaching method is being applied to them.
Last night I was thinking about this and about smart people I have known through life and how I was always a bit surprised that they didn't do better in school, that they didn't seem to have the academic success I would have expected considering how intelligent they all are. I wonder if it is dyslexia and if they have just compensated in various ways to get through life since no one every really helped them the way my daughter has been helped. What a loss to society that by not being taught to read by a good method they want nothing more to do with academics.
Then I thought about my daughter, who could pass a spelling test with A's in first grade but then wouldn't recognize the same word on a page. (Remember dyslexia is a fingerprint and every person's is different).
Then I was thinking about her in terms of her memory (excellent). That gave me hope for the future too.
And I was thinking about now, how she can read and all we are doing is maintaining where she is and hopefully improving her reading speed/rate (we will see I'm not holding my breath but then again I've been surprised before at the changes can be made when one is in the right hands).
So the next huge hurdle for her will come when we transition her back into Catholic school. I hope that wont be until fourth grade.
My teacher friend says up until fourth grade children are learning to read, in fourth grade they begin reading to learn. I believe that.
I thought we would make personal breakthroughs (sort of like reinventing the wheel) rather than find that the tools we needed are already out there but expensive to afford.
I never expected that after getting a diagnosis the next hit would come when my daughter (and then later my son) totally had their rights trampled on by school professionals who had the agenda of protecting the school district's time energy and money by trying to deny my children the IEP's they are legally entitled to have based on their diagnosis.
On a positive day I see small changes in the world and think that maybe they are starting to add up. I think of all the celebrities who keep telling everyone that they have dyslexia and I think to myself every time the world heard the word dyslexia we get a tiny bit closer to taking care of the millions of children (and adults) who suffer because the wrong teaching method is being applied to them.
Last night I was thinking about this and about smart people I have known through life and how I was always a bit surprised that they didn't do better in school, that they didn't seem to have the academic success I would have expected considering how intelligent they all are. I wonder if it is dyslexia and if they have just compensated in various ways to get through life since no one every really helped them the way my daughter has been helped. What a loss to society that by not being taught to read by a good method they want nothing more to do with academics.
Then I thought about my daughter, who could pass a spelling test with A's in first grade but then wouldn't recognize the same word on a page. (Remember dyslexia is a fingerprint and every person's is different).
Then I was thinking about her in terms of her memory (excellent). That gave me hope for the future too.
And I was thinking about now, how she can read and all we are doing is maintaining where she is and hopefully improving her reading speed/rate (we will see I'm not holding my breath but then again I've been surprised before at the changes can be made when one is in the right hands).
So the next huge hurdle for her will come when we transition her back into Catholic school. I hope that wont be until fourth grade.
My teacher friend says up until fourth grade children are learning to read, in fourth grade they begin reading to learn. I believe that.
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