So in a recently past post I was talking about how the way reading is taught these days simply doesn't work well for a lot of people. (Some sources say 1/3 of the population). I found more proof of this when I read the book: The Good School: how smart parents get their children the education they deserve by Peg Tyre. I highly recommend that anyone having any sort of concerns about their child's reading check this book out of your local library.
Basically what it says is that around 1987 states started switching over to a "whole language" teaching method (translation: site word based instead of phonics based).
So reading that of course I had a big old AHA moment. Thanks Peg Tyre.
I'm not claiming to have all the answers or even that many answers but I took this ole bull by the horns as soon as I could and in my case that means my child is only in first grade struggling to read. If you are reading this and concerned about a child remember my mantra: EARLY INTERVENTION
So I have more to report. On accident (at the nail salon actually) I met a lady who is a tutor for the Children's Dyslexia Center. They are the organization funded by the Masons (Masonic Temple) that provides FREE tutoring services for children with dyslexia. (Yes, I said FREE!)
She was interested in the school my daughter now attends (she suspects a grandchild has dyslexia although he was only diagnosed with ADD). At the same time I was interested to hear more about her work. What I found out was really intriguing to me- she tutors 2 children twice a week. These children go to one of the more expensive Catholic schools in our area.
Here is the catch folks. To get the free tutoring you need the diagnosis- a good diagnosis is expensive. In our case it was $1500.00 with insurance only covering $450.00. We went with the number 2 doctor in town because I didn't want to wait on the 4 month waiting list while my kid suffered for the Number 1 name brand Doctor (who costs $1700.00 incidentally).
Friends the public schools are not doing a good job of testing our children in a timely manner (remember my local public school psychologist said it could be 2 years until they tested my kid and wrote the IEP for her and the public school tutor said she would only work off the IEP). This is ridiculous. This is class-ist (money based) and it is simply unacceptable.
Also I think I should point out that there is a reason the better doctors have waiting lists. There is an astronomical amount of mis-diagnosing going on. I can tell you that I know this to be true from a variety of sources. There are standard tests out there but many many of the doctors and supposed professionals using them do not know the ins and outs of applying the information they get from the tests. So simply having "testing" just is not enough.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Prisoner of Love aka Don't mess with Mama, Papa, Grandma etc.
In my long ago past I once dated a man who was a prison guard. He was a nice person and hadn't been on the job for very long. He worked hard but the inmates were always causing him grief in one way or another. It was hard to hear about such a nice person having to put up with so much. So I mulled it over.
What I came up with was this: the prisoners were there 24 hours 7 days a week. For my friend it was a job. He put in his hours then he went home and tried not to think about work too much. For the prisoners they had plenty of time, energy and really not too much else going on. It was part of their lifestyle to look at everything they knew about him and plan out what mental crap they were going to pull next.
Putting any issue about prisoners rights to the side for the moment since that isn't what this blog is about I want to say a few words of how this relates to learning differences, parents and schools.
In our last school there used to be this fairly common teacher/school administrator complaint that all the parents talked to each other (gossiped). It's probably true of most schools but certainly in the Catholic system where these folks have known each other awhile (decades sometimes) and also go to church together it's especially true.
Here is where we parents are like the prisoners though. We have a lot riding on whether our child is being treated correctly, taught appropriately and handled fairly. We aren't there all the time but if we care (and most of us do) we want to know and we will get our information any way we have to (including through gossip).
Teachers and School Administrators may want to go home and forget about little Johnny and his reading issues but a parent (even a busy one) will never forget. This makes us a formidable force.
Our new school for children with Dyslexia (love it) had a party tonight. We went, it was fun, my kids were happy. It was all pleasant.
Except that I was in a crabby mood (nerves?) and according to my husband was a big bitch to someone I should have been kissing the ass of. (Remember I want the state scholarship money and need an IEP for my daughter first in order to qualify and now there is a deadline of April 15th for paperwork to be in).
Still, I wanted to (in a sly, Southern woman type way) let the person I was talking to know the following:
1. I knew exactly who she is was and that she still has not called me back from weeks ago. (She was too busy supposedly but she didn't seem that busy to me at the party).
2. I had a talk with the school psychologist about our needs and the deadline. He didnt let me get a word in edgewise (and that's difficult to do) and basically had a whole back-off-pushy-parent M.O. I found him to be a big jerk (a common trait with the school psychologists I've dealt with) and I wont be forgetting that anytime soon.
3. My kid already has a dyslexia diagnosis. I'm really not concerned with any idle threats about not finding any real issue and therefore not qualifying for the IEP and scholarship. School office folk seem to like to qualify everything with well you can get the scholarship if there is really a problem. Listen up, there is and we wouldn't be at that SUPER Expensive school if there wasn't a diagnosis so quit trying to power-play me. (They dont have any real power so they throw around what little they have). I'm still contemplating throwing down that $400.00 retainer for the child advocate.
Remember the earlier story ---these school folks are the prison guards, and me, I'm the prisoner. So don't think I'm not spending my time/energy/money working every possible angle until I have the direction I need to go.
In other words, "Don't mess with Mama."
What I came up with was this: the prisoners were there 24 hours 7 days a week. For my friend it was a job. He put in his hours then he went home and tried not to think about work too much. For the prisoners they had plenty of time, energy and really not too much else going on. It was part of their lifestyle to look at everything they knew about him and plan out what mental crap they were going to pull next.
Putting any issue about prisoners rights to the side for the moment since that isn't what this blog is about I want to say a few words of how this relates to learning differences, parents and schools.
In our last school there used to be this fairly common teacher/school administrator complaint that all the parents talked to each other (gossiped). It's probably true of most schools but certainly in the Catholic system where these folks have known each other awhile (decades sometimes) and also go to church together it's especially true.
Here is where we parents are like the prisoners though. We have a lot riding on whether our child is being treated correctly, taught appropriately and handled fairly. We aren't there all the time but if we care (and most of us do) we want to know and we will get our information any way we have to (including through gossip).
Teachers and School Administrators may want to go home and forget about little Johnny and his reading issues but a parent (even a busy one) will never forget. This makes us a formidable force.
Our new school for children with Dyslexia (love it) had a party tonight. We went, it was fun, my kids were happy. It was all pleasant.
Except that I was in a crabby mood (nerves?) and according to my husband was a big bitch to someone I should have been kissing the ass of. (Remember I want the state scholarship money and need an IEP for my daughter first in order to qualify and now there is a deadline of April 15th for paperwork to be in).
Still, I wanted to (in a sly, Southern woman type way) let the person I was talking to know the following:
1. I knew exactly who she is was and that she still has not called me back from weeks ago. (She was too busy supposedly but she didn't seem that busy to me at the party).
2. I had a talk with the school psychologist about our needs and the deadline. He didnt let me get a word in edgewise (and that's difficult to do) and basically had a whole back-off-pushy-parent M.O. I found him to be a big jerk (a common trait with the school psychologists I've dealt with) and I wont be forgetting that anytime soon.
3. My kid already has a dyslexia diagnosis. I'm really not concerned with any idle threats about not finding any real issue and therefore not qualifying for the IEP and scholarship. School office folk seem to like to qualify everything with well you can get the scholarship if there is really a problem. Listen up, there is and we wouldn't be at that SUPER Expensive school if there wasn't a diagnosis so quit trying to power-play me. (They dont have any real power so they throw around what little they have). I'm still contemplating throwing down that $400.00 retainer for the child advocate.
Remember the earlier story ---these school folks are the prison guards, and me, I'm the prisoner. So don't think I'm not spending my time/energy/money working every possible angle until I have the direction I need to go.
In other words, "Don't mess with Mama."
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Our new school
My town has a unique school for children with dyslexia. Since dyslexia often comes in a combo-pack with other things like: ADD, ADHD, OCD, aspbergers etc. this school has to be prepared for a lot.
Mostly due to my mother's insistence (thanks Nana) my daughter has now been in her new school for over a week. It's going well. It's hugely expensive (I may have said that before now but here is a reminder).
We went to our first kid-birthday party from someone in her new class and my mouth about dropped to the floor when I heard the schools some of these children had been pulled out of. Only "the best" and most expensive schools in my city. Suprisingly those schools dont tolerate, or want, or like, children with learning differences very much. Who knew?
At this point my daughter has to pick this up as quickly as possible. I'm hoping the school gives her what she need so we can move back into the setting we are used to. Let's see how it goes.
Mostly due to my mother's insistence (thanks Nana) my daughter has now been in her new school for over a week. It's going well. It's hugely expensive (I may have said that before now but here is a reminder).
We went to our first kid-birthday party from someone in her new class and my mouth about dropped to the floor when I heard the schools some of these children had been pulled out of. Only "the best" and most expensive schools in my city. Suprisingly those schools dont tolerate, or want, or like, children with learning differences very much. Who knew?
At this point my daughter has to pick this up as quickly as possible. I'm hoping the school gives her what she need so we can move back into the setting we are used to. Let's see how it goes.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
The first IEP meeting
IEP stands for Individualized Education Plan
This is a legal document which parents can request to get from their public school. The parents local public school system is required by law to address a request for an evaluation by a parent (in any type of school within their district). Laws may differ in various states (I'm not sure).
In my opinion this is a very valuable document. If a child needed a wheelchair ramp to get to school this is something that would be written into an IEP.
Public schools are required to meet the needs specified within the IEP (an example for a child with dyslexia might be extra time to take a test). Private schools are not required to meet expectations within IEP's but they may formulate their own paperwork in order to accommodate a child's needs.
Here is my story:
I probably wouldn't have asked for an IEP evaluation so quickly except that in our state there is currently a large (over 7K) scholarship to pay for tutoring etc. and to get that scholarship one needs to have the IEP.
At $50-$75.00 per hour for a good Orton-Gillingham trained tutor the bills would really add up. Plus, there is an $1,800.00 summer camp that is for dyslexia (we are on the waiting list - it has been filled for 6 weeks already). In my house $7,0000 is a lot of money. By the end of this year of finding out about our child's dyslexia we will undoubtedly have spent this much.
I was scheduled to have a meeting with the public school official and a school official (the principal) of our Catholic school. I thought the meeting was to set up further testing (the public school always wants to do their own I heard).
My thought was that I would have a meeting (required) with the public school official, the principal of our current school and we were essentially setting up a time for further testing.
Usually my husband would attend a meeting regarding our child with me, but he had an important meeting at work on the other side of town so I was on my own.
(Side Note: I have found at our school that my husband is taken seriously while I am not considered to be anyone of consequence. I am not alone in this thinking, some of my mommy friends have felt that way too, but, as my husband says, they see a lot of mommies. I guess this is part of the reason a mommy isn't really taken too seriously around there, it couldn't possibly be the Catholic-take on women as lesser citizens is it?)
I went to the library to copy the doctor's paperwork for the meeting and on the way I got a call back from the Child Advocate that parents (mostly the suburban ones) end up hiring ($400 retainer and $80.00 per hour for this service) in order to get what they need in the way of IEP's. I had called with a few questions about what it was that she did exactly. I had spoken to her before and she had been very helpful (honestly I probably already owe her money even though I have yet to hire her- she was that helpful).
She gave me a bit of advice, she said don't let them get away with just doing a screening (they sometimes try this) she also said to look for an SLD category (dyslexia falls under this)and that my child should be seen by a speech pathologist (which was apparently not part of her testing that she's already had -remember that cost $1,500.00 and one would think that would be worth something but person after person has tried to be dismissive about what the findings were). I am not that good at remembering this kind of thing so I wrote it all down. Her timing could not have been better.
So there was lil ole me (sorry I was raised by Southerners and sometimes I fall back on that) walking into this meeting with a couple folks, or so I thought. Imagine my surprise when there were 2 people from the public school system, plus my kid's teacher, plus the principal (remember the old bag who tried more than once to dissuade me from having my daughter tested). I was sure wishin my husband was there with me at that point (he can be a real ball breaker while I am more mild-mannered, generally I know my place as a passive female in our society).
So guess what happened next. That principal pulled every book my daughter had read, every test score she had taken and everything she could to show how well my daughter had progressed. She kept talking about how there wasn't really a problem and basically tried to make me out to be some out-of-control nutcase.
Well at that point I already knew I was taking my daughter out of the school, which was quite helpful. I didn't reveal that information at any point since I didn't have any official paperwork signed or checks delivered but I'll tell you what I was astonished at this attack.
I had thougth we were simply setting a date for further testing to get the IEP.
The other day my kid had gotten her second report card for first grade and strangely every single issue that had made her first report card so lousy was suddenly fixed. I was surprised to say the least. Somehow every single issue became a non-issue? None of that made sense.
Until now. The principal pulled out that report card too and of course had her teacher say a few words about how she was progressing normally and so on.
After I picked my mouth up off the floor at this blatant attack I started to speak my piece, and the teacher and principal quickly interrupted.
I said that I had seen no evidence of any Orton-Gillingham instruction in my nightly reading with my daughter until after we actually had a diagnosis (despite the fact that the tutor is supposedly "trained" in O.G.).
The principal mentioned how my daughter had been out of school that week for 2 days at least twice, trying to make me look like a bad mother I assume (my daughter had been visiting the school for children with dyslexia both days per their request to see if she would fit with the rest of the class). I did not bite on this obvious bait.
But I was pissed when they interrupted. I could not understand their agenda in making my daughter seem as though there was nothing wrong (when we all knew that there was a learning difference). They knew I wanted the IEP for the scholarship money and that my family could most certainly use that money. So why? I will probably never know.
I cracked my verbal whip.
The principal knew every single point I was going to make (remember I had that nice conversation with her last Friday where I tried to get her to change her "Wait and See" tune).
But she didn't know what I found out last Sunday after church about the child with dyslexia who is now in 7th grade that they had told the parents to "Wait and See" until the parents moved to a supposedly learning difference friendly suburban school in 5th grade (she still doesn't have an IEP incidentally).
The principals lame response to my throwing that out was that their tutor wasn't Orton-Gillingham trained until two years ago (as if that let's any educator off the hook).
In the meanwhile thank God the public school official (and her sidekick) didn't buy the principals song and dance. She looked at the doctor's report and asked why I wanted the IEP.
I told her about my brother and how he had suffered back in the 1980's in an inner-city LD class (probably one of the worst in the state at the time). And I told her all I knew.
I told her I had been advised about what to ask for, got out my notes and then dropped the name of the child advocate.
Mean-ole mama bear was out and I wasn't going anyplace without a fight.
The public school lady agreed to my requests.
Whew.
The End (well not exactly)
Ps. I once had the meanest son-of-a-bitch-boss that ever lived. I kept a record of every detail of every verbal abuse with that nasty woman. My secret weapon in that situation served me well, I always had a tape recorder in my purse and I carried my purse with me at all times. Guess who had a tape recorder going at this meeting?
This is a legal document which parents can request to get from their public school. The parents local public school system is required by law to address a request for an evaluation by a parent (in any type of school within their district). Laws may differ in various states (I'm not sure).
In my opinion this is a very valuable document. If a child needed a wheelchair ramp to get to school this is something that would be written into an IEP.
Public schools are required to meet the needs specified within the IEP (an example for a child with dyslexia might be extra time to take a test). Private schools are not required to meet expectations within IEP's but they may formulate their own paperwork in order to accommodate a child's needs.
Here is my story:
I probably wouldn't have asked for an IEP evaluation so quickly except that in our state there is currently a large (over 7K) scholarship to pay for tutoring etc. and to get that scholarship one needs to have the IEP.
At $50-$75.00 per hour for a good Orton-Gillingham trained tutor the bills would really add up. Plus, there is an $1,800.00 summer camp that is for dyslexia (we are on the waiting list - it has been filled for 6 weeks already). In my house $7,0000 is a lot of money. By the end of this year of finding out about our child's dyslexia we will undoubtedly have spent this much.
I was scheduled to have a meeting with the public school official and a school official (the principal) of our Catholic school. I thought the meeting was to set up further testing (the public school always wants to do their own I heard).
My thought was that I would have a meeting (required) with the public school official, the principal of our current school and we were essentially setting up a time for further testing.
Usually my husband would attend a meeting regarding our child with me, but he had an important meeting at work on the other side of town so I was on my own.
(Side Note: I have found at our school that my husband is taken seriously while I am not considered to be anyone of consequence. I am not alone in this thinking, some of my mommy friends have felt that way too, but, as my husband says, they see a lot of mommies. I guess this is part of the reason a mommy isn't really taken too seriously around there, it couldn't possibly be the Catholic-take on women as lesser citizens is it?)
I went to the library to copy the doctor's paperwork for the meeting and on the way I got a call back from the Child Advocate that parents (mostly the suburban ones) end up hiring ($400 retainer and $80.00 per hour for this service) in order to get what they need in the way of IEP's. I had called with a few questions about what it was that she did exactly. I had spoken to her before and she had been very helpful (honestly I probably already owe her money even though I have yet to hire her- she was that helpful).
She gave me a bit of advice, she said don't let them get away with just doing a screening (they sometimes try this) she also said to look for an SLD category (dyslexia falls under this)and that my child should be seen by a speech pathologist (which was apparently not part of her testing that she's already had -remember that cost $1,500.00 and one would think that would be worth something but person after person has tried to be dismissive about what the findings were). I am not that good at remembering this kind of thing so I wrote it all down. Her timing could not have been better.
So there was lil ole me (sorry I was raised by Southerners and sometimes I fall back on that) walking into this meeting with a couple folks, or so I thought. Imagine my surprise when there were 2 people from the public school system, plus my kid's teacher, plus the principal (remember the old bag who tried more than once to dissuade me from having my daughter tested). I was sure wishin my husband was there with me at that point (he can be a real ball breaker while I am more mild-mannered, generally I know my place as a passive female in our society).
So guess what happened next. That principal pulled every book my daughter had read, every test score she had taken and everything she could to show how well my daughter had progressed. She kept talking about how there wasn't really a problem and basically tried to make me out to be some out-of-control nutcase.
Well at that point I already knew I was taking my daughter out of the school, which was quite helpful. I didn't reveal that information at any point since I didn't have any official paperwork signed or checks delivered but I'll tell you what I was astonished at this attack.
I had thougth we were simply setting a date for further testing to get the IEP.
The other day my kid had gotten her second report card for first grade and strangely every single issue that had made her first report card so lousy was suddenly fixed. I was surprised to say the least. Somehow every single issue became a non-issue? None of that made sense.
Until now. The principal pulled out that report card too and of course had her teacher say a few words about how she was progressing normally and so on.
After I picked my mouth up off the floor at this blatant attack I started to speak my piece, and the teacher and principal quickly interrupted.
I said that I had seen no evidence of any Orton-Gillingham instruction in my nightly reading with my daughter until after we actually had a diagnosis (despite the fact that the tutor is supposedly "trained" in O.G.).
The principal mentioned how my daughter had been out of school that week for 2 days at least twice, trying to make me look like a bad mother I assume (my daughter had been visiting the school for children with dyslexia both days per their request to see if she would fit with the rest of the class). I did not bite on this obvious bait.
But I was pissed when they interrupted. I could not understand their agenda in making my daughter seem as though there was nothing wrong (when we all knew that there was a learning difference). They knew I wanted the IEP for the scholarship money and that my family could most certainly use that money. So why? I will probably never know.
I cracked my verbal whip.
The principal knew every single point I was going to make (remember I had that nice conversation with her last Friday where I tried to get her to change her "Wait and See" tune).
But she didn't know what I found out last Sunday after church about the child with dyslexia who is now in 7th grade that they had told the parents to "Wait and See" until the parents moved to a supposedly learning difference friendly suburban school in 5th grade (she still doesn't have an IEP incidentally).
The principals lame response to my throwing that out was that their tutor wasn't Orton-Gillingham trained until two years ago (as if that let's any educator off the hook).
In the meanwhile thank God the public school official (and her sidekick) didn't buy the principals song and dance. She looked at the doctor's report and asked why I wanted the IEP.
I told her about my brother and how he had suffered back in the 1980's in an inner-city LD class (probably one of the worst in the state at the time). And I told her all I knew.
I told her I had been advised about what to ask for, got out my notes and then dropped the name of the child advocate.
Mean-ole mama bear was out and I wasn't going anyplace without a fight.
The public school lady agreed to my requests.
Whew.
The End (well not exactly)
Ps. I once had the meanest son-of-a-bitch-boss that ever lived. I kept a record of every detail of every verbal abuse with that nasty woman. My secret weapon in that situation served me well, I always had a tape recorder in my purse and I carried my purse with me at all times. Guess who had a tape recorder going at this meeting?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)